Set loving limits.

Mistakes are part of healthy growth. Limits are loving.

Mistakes are a huge part of any growth journey. Emotional self-regulation takes a long time to master! One of the kindest, most loving things nurturers can do for little ones is to show empathy for their mistakes, and still set limits.

  • Show me sadness–not anger–on your face when I have hurt someone, crossed a limit, or made a poor choice.
  • Gently remove me from a stressful situation in which I cannot control my emotions.  Comfort me in a quiet place til I can return and try again.
  • Consider the last time I ate, or how well I’ve been sleeping.  No one functions well when they are “hangry” or tired.  Be aware of and respect my limits!
  • If I hurt someone else, or make them feel sad, let me see that child’s response.  Tell me what that child is feeling. Show me how to extend comfort. Help me repair the situation and relationship.
  • Please don’t isolate me when I make mistakes.  Reassure me of your love even when I behave in unlovable ways.  Stay with me so I know that I’m not alone in my BIG feelings.

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