See eye contact as an invitation to connect.

The eyes hold connective power.

Making eye contact, even with newborns, builds a critical earliest communication and relationship skill. Quantity and quality of eye contact matter! A stronger baby brain, and a more secure attachment relationship, are built through frequent and prolonged “serve and return” interactions.

  • When I make eye contact with you, it means that I want to engage with you: to learn from you, to share an experience with you, or to seek comfort and security from you. 
  • Over time, I will learn that when you make eye contact with me, you are inviting me to engage with you. I will look to you for a name or label, a shared laugh, an explanation of my world, or assurance of your nearness.
  • Honor my limits. If I keep looking away from you, I am likely trying to tell you I am tired or disinterested. This may be the only way I can communicate that I am all done for now. 
  • When you give me a bit of rest or a change of scenery, my brain will refresh and my curiosity will return.  We can both take deep breaths and trust this natural process of growing together in our relationship.  

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